CHILDHOOD AND TEENAGE LETTERS OF ABRAHAM SUGDEN

Home
Adult letters

THE CHILDHOOD AND TEENAGE LETTERS OF ABRAHAM SUGDEN


1808: aged 8 Addressed to: M^rs Soper Rainham Near Chatham With Speed See notes & pictures.	Oh Grandmma I have got Such a Dear Sister & Thomas and I love her Dearly
	Abe Sugden May 14^th 1808
	His Majestys Ship Goliath July 27^th 1813 lying at Spithead
1813: aged 13 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden's Boarding School Gillingham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother I have sent two Letters to you but I have received no answer. The first I sent to you was I sent Ł5 in it & I wish to know wether you have got it or not, because I am very uneasy about it / and I shall be glad if you will be so good as to send me a good long letter as soon as you possibly can because we should go to Sea as soon as we possibly can. We shall ly at this Port only six days / My dear Mother, I am in very low spirits at present; but sometimes My Old Messmate cheers me up & says I must not be so downhearted. I have God Almighty for my friend he is my guide my trust and my councilor / I do miss you very much indeed / My Old gunner is agoing to leave the Ship & I asked him about my mess in with him he said he should not charge me to much. So give my duty to my dear Grandfather & Grandmother & also give my love to my dear Brother & Sister.
	I am My Dear Mother Your affectionate Son Abrm Sugden
	P.S. Master Maitland told me that his Uncle said I was a nice little fellow & said he should not like to part from me. Direct to M^r A Sugden on board His Majestys Ship Goliath lying at Spithead. A Sugden.
	His Majestys Ship Goliath at Tor Bay 13 August 1813.
1813: aged 13 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden's Boarding School Gillingham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother I received your kind letter on the 3^rd Instant. I told you that my Old Gunner was a going to exchange with Senn but Senn did not like to exchange / I have only wrote you a few lines to let you know where we are but I shall write you another when we get near Cork but we should not anchor at Cork / and you told me that I should forget you but dear Mother you hurt my feelings very much indeed when you say so, I will wish you happy all the days of your life you may depend / I have got a Log Book at last and so I keep every thing in it / We are agoing out for a long Voyage / my Old Clothes are to small for me I have very little time to spare I can assure you because I am oblig'd to go in the Office every day after meals, I have no more to say at moment so Dear Mother give my respectful Compliments to Captain Mansel and tell him where we are and tell him that we have got 33 Sail of Ships under convoy of us also give my duty to my dear Grandfather and Grandmother and love to brother and Sister.
	I am My dear Mother Your affectionate Son A Sugden
	PS do not answer his letter because we shall sail immediately the wind comes fair pray excuse this bad scrawl. Adieu A Sugden
	His Majestys Ship Goliath Burmuda 29^th Nov^r 1813
1813: aged 14 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden's Boarding School Gillingham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother I write these few lines to you to inform you that Mr Goodenham Gun^r is Superannuated out of His Majesty's Service for old age and unfit for Services and you know that the agreement was made for him to charge no more than Six Guineas per annum for my mess so I shall be very glad if you will pay him the sum of 3Ł because I have Messed with him six months; he will come to you for the money by and by for he is in no hurry for it. I shall mess with the other Gunner that comes in his room. My dear Mother I have been very ill indeed with a very bad cold but thank God I am a great deal better. I shall be very glad to see you again for I am almost mad the Ship where at Sea She spoils all my shoes & clothes for She rolls very much indeed and the water comes in up to our knees so that it makes it very uncomfortable. We are a setting out for five Months Cruize and we are a going to a very cold place off the Coast of Americia. I am getting on in Navigation very well indeed I have no more news to tell you at Present so My dear Mother. I hope you are well and give my (crossed out) to Capitn & M^rs Mansel also my duty to my Dear Grandfather and Grandmother with my love to my dear Brother and Sister.
	I am My dear Mother Your dutiful & affectionate Son Abrm Sugden
	PS when you write to A Sugden HMS Goliath Bermuda or elsewhere Pray excuse the bad writing
	His Majesty's Ship Goliath Bermuda 22^ndFeby 1814
1814: aged 14 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T. Soper’s Rainham Near Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My only Dear Mother I have this day received a letter from you dated 13th October 1813 You do not know my Dear Mother how glad I was to hear from you. Know my dear mother I will begin and tell you all the news I can; first you wanted to know the particulars of my doing my Duty as a Midⁿ . the reason that I was obliged to have the Office was thus, the Clerk when first I went onb^d the Ship behaved very kind indeed to me he was always instructing me in everything that can be mentioned in the Office line but after we had been out to Sea four or five months he treated me as a dog, and was always striking and beating me about just as he pleased till I could not bear it any longer; and therefore I stated all this to the Captain. He severely reprimanded him for his conduct to me; soon afterwards I went on the quarter Deck to know what I should do and the Captain asked me if I could do Mid^ns Duty. I said yes Sir and he said that I shou'd do that duty as a Midⁿ this I can assure you is the whole truth of the matter. My dear Mother you tell me you have left G. and also you have had very ill treatment from my Father, aunts and Grandmother but do not mind them. I will comfort you all through life also I will talk to my poor unfortunate Father when I am home on that subject. I am very happy to hear that you have got some ladies to instruct and hope you will succeed in getting more. I have enquired about the person but could not find him out. Now I must give an account of the H.M.S Goliath She is a very fast sailer, but the most uncomfortablest Ship that ever sailed the Sea's When at Sea she is always wet and uncomfortable, I have got three or four of my best shirts spoilt they are entirely rot by the wet. I have taken so much care as I possibly could of all my things the Blue cloathes are all very well at present. I am very sorry to say that a very heavy sea struck the Ship in the Waist and almost filled the Forcockpit full of water and it also came into our Cabin and wet everything there all my writing books & Paper & got all rendered useless. I am learning Navigation very fast indeed I am in Traverse Sailing. We are a setting the Ship out again at Bermuda and after we have finished we are agoing out for a five months Cruize after the enemys frigates and whereas we can get information of these I understand there is fourteen French frigates are Cruizing about and two or three Yankees. After we have done cruising we are agoing to Halifax and then I will make it my business to call on M^r Percy. O my dear Mother I have got no friend onb^d the Ship. But god Almighty has been my friend ever since I have been in the Ship I have no one to trust to but him and he helps me all through my troubles. I hope my dear Mother this will find you an all friends well at present give my Duty to my F. also my respectful Compliments to Captⁿ Mansel, give my duty to my dear Grandfather & Grandmother & I hope they are well. Give my love to my Dear little Sister & a thousand Kisses also love to my Dear Brother Tell Thomas when you write to him that I am very angry with him for not writing to his Dear Mother who has taken so much care of him through life. Will you be so good as to send me a little money to wash my clothes.
	I remain My only dear Mother Your Dutiful Son Abr^m Sugden
	P.S. direct to me at Halifax Pray Excuse this Scral Adieu Dear Mother
	His Majestys Ship Conway Nov^r 7^th 1814 Little Nore
1814: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At M^r T. Sopers Rainham near Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My hon^d and dear Mother I write to inform you that we have just arrived at Sheerness – I do not think that Captⁿ Mansel has wrote to Capt Tancock as I have not heard any thing yet, I have enquired every day of the Clerk about it. If I am not rated when I come home I will not stop in the service for I will come home and help you till I can get a better situation to assist you and my dear brother and Sister; the Captains Steward tells me that M^r Watson the Ironmonger has been telling Captⁿ Tancock something about me, but he will not tell me what it is about so I wish you would enquire about it and let me know what it is for. I do not like any body would trouble their heads about me, I don’t thank M^r Watson for troubling his head about me for I am sure I don’t concern him/ I told you before I was very comfortable in messing with the gunner, he pays every attention to me, he says my mess will not come to much. We are a going to stop at the little Nore about six days or a week; I have not heard Any thing yet where we are a going. Last Sunday I was ask’d out to dinner at M^r Maddocks if we stop there, but I should have disappointed them and come home to see you. I do not know that I can say any more at present so dear Mother give my duty to my Grandfather & Grandma and my Kind love to you and my dear little sister, remember me to all the young ladies and hope you are all well.
	I remain My honoured and dear Mother Your dutiful and affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	P.S. direct to me at the Little Nore, or elsewhere & excuse the bad writing Adieu A.S.
	His Majestys Ship Conway Spithead Nov 26^th 1814
1814: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At M^r T Sopers Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My Hon^d & dear Mother I received you Kind and reviving letter on the 12^th ult^o; I got my certificates safe you say in your letter that I take no notice of the notes you sent me but I can assure you that I set as much store by them as if I had the whole world. I have wrote to Captain Maitland as you desired me and hope I shall receive favourable answer, he has got the Boyne of 90 guns and he is a going to America again & when he gets there he is a going to have the Tonnant 74 guns. You say that you are afraid of not seeing Capt^tn Mansel any more, but I hope he may get a good ship and if he does let me know what She is, you say that you suppose the Officers had but an indifferent opinion of you but you must not mind that. I do not for they are not worthy of my notice, some of them pretend to know everything and no nothing, but the Captain behaves a father to his ship is company, you say that the Midⁿ treat me with contempt as my F is in so low a capacity but none of them know anything about him, there is only one Midⁿ that I like and that is M^r Maddocks whose father is a Gunner of the Argonaut, but as for letting any body know any thing about my F, I am sure I shall do no such thing. when I come home again I hope, I shall have something to give you especially if we see the ?Wasse? American we will let him know who is alongside of him, We sailed from Sheerness on the 18^th & arrived at the downs on the 20^th at which place we stayed 3 days by reason of having a foul wind. I could not get on shore to see my uncle Snoswell but I sent a note & I dare say twenty messages for him to come off and see me but it was all in vain and I was very much hurt about it. & you may tell him that I am very much off indeed with him when you write to him. I believe we are agoing to america but I do not wish to go in her if I can get with captⁿ Maitland, She sails very well indeed and I hope will be a good sea boat I hope you will write to me by return of post for fear of our sailing and if I go with Captⁿ Maitland I will let you know. We do not know how long we shall stay out. I do not know that I can say any more now at present so my dear Mother give my duty to my Grandf^r & Grandma & my most kind & hearty love to you my dear beloved Brother when he comes home & remember me to all the young ladies.
	I remain My hon^d & dear Mother Your dutiful and affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	P.S. direct to me at Spithead or elsewhere do not fail to write & excuse the bad scrawl. Adieu A.S.
	His Majestys Ship Conway Falmouth Dec^r 8^th 1814
1814: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr^rT Sopers Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Beloved Mother Having received no answer to my letter or the 27^th of November when we where at Portsmouth at which place we sailed from on the 2^nd of Dec^r but by reason of contrary winds we where obliged to put into this Port. I hope my dear Mother you will write to me as soon as possible for I do not know what I have done that you should punish me in this manner. I am sure I shall die if you do not write to me my heart is half broken already. Oh I will tell you what a most shocking thing that happened to me on the night of the 6^th inst it was blowing a very heavy gale of wind when just at 2 o clock a ship came running up to us when she almost touched our bowsprit if she had both of us would have gone to the bottom and when she came alongside of us our Captain hailed her but the men and master were so frightened that they would not speak. I have received no answer to the letter to Captain Maitland, we are a going to Madeira under a convoy of HMS Ship the Swiftsure with 220 sail, we expect to stop here about one week, we have had very dreadful weather since we sailed from Portsmouth. I hope my dear Mother that the next letter I send to you will be a little better composed but I write it in a great hurry to save post. O h dear mother do not forget to write to your son if I could get a letter from you I should jump masthead high for joy. If there is any thing the matter at home let me know for I am fearful there is for I am sure you would not keep me in such suspense if there was not. My dear mother I am not rated anything yet but hope I shall be if you can find out where Capt^r Mansel is and what ship he has got let me know for I know he will take me. We expect to make a great deal of priz's as there is a great many Privateers about I do not know that I can say any more at Present So My dear Mother give my duty to my Grandf^r & Grandma my kind love to you my dear little Sister and Brother when he comes home give my best to all the young ladies I hope you are all well as it leaves me at Present.
	I remain My dear beloved Mother Your dutifull & affectionate Son Abraham Sugden.
	P.S. direct to me at Falmouth or elsewhere & do not fail writing. Adieu my dear Mother A Sugden.
	HM Ship Conway Plymouth Sound 14 June 1815
1815: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T Soper's Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear beloved Mother I received your letter on the 25^th of last month with the two half notes; you tell me about keeping my clothes in good order, I believe my clothes are in as good order as any one's. I do not want a great coat my old clothes that you had made at Mr Cottons when I first came into the Service they are now in rags. I gave my old trousers to Mr Maddocks for a better pair, because he wanted them for patches, any of my clothes that want mending I can cut the oldest of them up for patches. I may want a jacket and trousers by & by and 1 pair of shoes but not yet. we do not know where we are a going as we are under Admiralty Orders, they are a keeping us in readiness, likewise some more Ships to make a Squadron. I bought a Hat at 12d got my old one covered at 7d bought some pens, papers pencil, a clothes brush, thread, needles, silks, going on shore and coming on board cost about Ł1 and Ł1 I gave to Captain Tancock. I am not rated but hope very soon to be Clerk of a Brig Captn Tancock says that he is very sorry that he has got a clerk he did not know that I could do the duty until the purser told him that the clerk that he has got now is a going to teach me short hand writing and to play the flutes. I like him a great deal better than the one we had before he is a Sober steady good young man and has been a long time in the Service. I wish it was a war that we might go to Sea to pick up some prizes, the Ship is a very good sea boat and sails very well, we have got a fine Ships Company. I do not think a French Frigate would dare to come alongside us we would make his timbers shake and cry for Quarters. I had forgot to tell you that I have been on board the Bellerophon and saw all my old ship mates some of them are Lieutenants and Masters now; Captⁿ Tancock spoke to Captn Maitland for him to take me but Captn Maitland said he could not think of taking me without giving me a better rating he says that the rating that I have got now is to paltry for such an old Man of ?uois? man as me. when he comes in again he will take me if he has got a good rating. Master Goodwin and Maitland desire me to remember them to you and all friends. I saw them at Madeira but forgot to tell you of it. Master Beau received a letter today that informed me that you or my Aunt is quite surprised at my not writing before. if it is my Aunt at Brompton she may be surprized for I cared for I shall never write to her unless it is your wish, you told me in your last letter not to write until I knew where the ship was going. I hope that you will get acquainted with Mr. Beau & family as his son xxx he seemed very much like a gentleman. I do not know xxxxxxxxxx can say any more at present. give my dutiful xxxxxx Grandmamma & Grandpapa my love to you my brother and dear little Sister and thousand kisses, give my love to Miskin and all the young ladies - excuse all mistakes & the scrall.
	I remain for ever and every My dear beloved Mother Your dutiful and affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	PS. direct to Plymouth Sound or elsewhere and you forgot to tell me how my dear Miskin in your hasty letter but I hope you will tell me particularly in the next. Adieu My dear Mother write by return of post
	His Majestys Ship Conway Plymouth Sound 30^th July 1815
1815: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T Soper's Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear beloved Mother I write to inform you that we arrived at this port of the 29th inst from a cruise, we sailed from Plymouth on the 23rd June last, we had not been out long, before we fell in and captured the French National Frigate Panther'e of 36 guns lading with Rum, Coffee, Sugar and Money from Martinique bound to Dunquerque in France, we fired several shots at her before she would strike; when we came alongside of him our Captain told him to strike, but he made some to do about it, then our Captain told him if he would not haul down his colours immediately he would sink him, when he heard that he was obliged to strike; If he had not struck we would soon have made him or any other French Frigate that likes to come alongside the Conway. I am not rated yet but Captain Tancock says he will rate me Midshipman, because Clerks do not get on in the Service so fast as Midshipmen if the Ship is paid off it is of no use, but if not he will rate me - If they pay the Ships off. I do not know what I shall do I hope you will try and get me some situation on shore If my Uncle Sugden was not at variance with you he could get me a situation in the dock yard, has my Grandfather got Interests any where that he may get me some place, the situation that I hold now is of no use at all; will nobody try to do something for poor Sugden, Oh; if my father had not been as bad a man, we all should have been happy; then you would have been comforted and beheld your family smiling about you; but alas; God Almighty will punish him for all his wickedness, and help you through all our troubles. I hope you will live to see the day when your sons will be able to comfort their dear Mother in her old age, - I hear that Captain Maitland has had the good fortune to get Buonaparte, I would go and see him but no one is allowed to go on board the Ship he shows himself every fine day on the gangway to the people that come out in shore boats to see him. He converses with the Seamen and is very familiar with every body. If I am rated I shall want a new jacket and trousers, as it is I want a pair of trousers and Shoes, these ?mess? trousers have got to small for me, every time I put them on they tear to pieces; I wonder when I shall be able to help you and myself I hope some good luck will attend me. I do every thing that I can, I am very well liked by my Officers and they are eager for my promotion I know the duty of Clerk as well as any body and I do not know what keeps me backwards. I hope you will write to me immediately and let me know any thing that you can tell me. (I have spent all my money about the things I told you of in my last letter). I do not know that I can say any more at present so give my duty to my dear Grandma and Grandfather: my love to you my brother and dear Am******love to Miss M Miskin and all the young ladies do not make yourself uneasy but receive some consolation.
	My dear beloved Mother From your Dutiful and Affectionate Son Abraham Sugden

	His Majestys Ship Conway Plymouth 16 August 1815
1815: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T Soper's Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Beloved Mother I have received your two letters. One dated the 22^nd June with an order for 1Ł and the other the 3^rd of August - I write to inform you that the Conway is a going to be paid off on the 18 inst and recommissioned. I asked Captain Tancock if he would allow me to stop in the Ship. His answer was, that I must write to you, and let you know how I was situated and said that it was injurious for me to stop in the Ship as he could not rate me when the Ship is on the Peace Establishment, and that I must go home and get some situation on shore. I do not know what you can think of him but I can assure you he has behaved very ungenerous to me. My friend the Clerk says he has not behaved to me as he ought to have done. I shall come home, but I shall wait for answer to this letter. Oh! My dear Mother you will see your Son again after been in the Service three years, and trying to get a livelyhood to help his dear Mother, and now to come home with nothing as you may say. When I do come home, what shall I have to do, there is no situation on shore for me no friends nor no nothing. This has been a fatal attempt to gain a livelyhood. But I hope god Almighty will not leave me and that He will help the forsaken Widow and her unhappy children, I say forsaken because you have no one to help you nor your poor Children, there will be a time (I hope) when I shall see you comfortable. I hope my Dear brother will not make such an unfavourable attempt to gain a livelihood as his unfortunate Brother has. I am almost distracted to see myself cast away on this wide world and no one to help me god Almighty will help us all I hope. I shall come home as cheap as I possibly can. I shall come be Water not by land. I shall thank my Grandmamma for her present when I come home. I hope you will excuse these few lines as I am helping the Clerk to make out the Captains Accounts. I hope you will write me an answer immediately and let me know what I am to do. Master Maddocks will accompany me in my passage to Chatham. We are both Mess mates, I send my love to you and give my love to my Brother my dear little Sister my Duty to my Grandfather and Grandma my love to Miskin and all the young Ladies.
	I remain Forever Me dear and only dear Mother Your dutiful and Affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	PS I write immediately and forgive this scrall and the Bad English as I am in great haste
	His Majesty's Schooner Musquidobet In Portsmouth Harbour Sept 27 1815
1815: aged 15 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T. Sopers Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother I write these few lines to let you know that I arrived safe at Portsmouth on Saturday the 16. who do you suppose I fell in with in the same coach, why Master Maitland he has got a frigate at Portsmouth the Inconstant; he says he never received the notes I sent to him, he informs me that Goodwin has gone home to his Mother. Maitland has got a Months leave and he is gone home for that time he sends his best respects to you all, he behaved very well indeed to me to so cold as he was the time before, when we arrived at Portsmouth we ate some supper and went to bed. the next morning we parted very good friends, indeed he onboard his ship and me to find mine, but I could not. I was obliged to run all over Portsmouth that day and at last I found the Commander. I remained at his house for better than two days then I went on board a Hulk there to remain until the Schooner is ready for receiving me, he is a good sort of a man and was very kind to me, we have only two Midshipmen, I am Clerk, Pursers Steward, Pursers and all the rest. I have to keep their Accounts, we have no Pursers Steward so I am obliged to do that duty thank God I know that duty pretty well or else I do not know what I should do. I am not very well situated as to Mess (I want some of your advice) the Midshipmen appear to be a set of extravagant fellows if they go on the way they do now I will not mess with them. I do not know whether I shall have a Cabin or not, for the Schooner is in Dock. She is a beautiful Vessel all the Portsmouth Bucks come in the yard every day w their opinions upon her where she is fitted I suspect she will move like a Yatcht than a Man of War Schooner for the Dock yard men are doing every thing so very neat the Americans work was neat but our people mean to have this better. - When I was In London my Grandfather behaved very well indeed he gave me 1Ł to pay for my Chest when I got to Portsmouth and he also made me a present of a Silver pencil case, Tommy was very glad to see me he sends his love to you and Amelia, - when I asked M^r Pollard how M^rs Pollard was he hung down his head and said ! Ask her Sugden. He went away and said no more, only the usual compliments, I enquired of miss Caroline how her Mamma was, she said she was a great deal better than she had been - I never saw such a short thing as Miss Caroline is why I could put her under my arm. I did not see Miss Louisa but I saw Mr William Pollard he his a little short fellow, he is not taller than myself, - he was very glad to see me I can assure you he sends his best respects to all our family. - I have received my Chest every thing in it is right except the currant juice and it run all through my towels and the cake got mouldy I paid 1Ł.2s.9 for my chest at 6 Shillings for a hundred weight. I could not stop to see the weighed or else I would. I have a great deal to do I can assure you with one thing and the other. I have to go every morning to the Commanders with the daily progress from thence to the Admirals Office, so that I am obliged to keep my second best clothes out but I shift myself when I come ?aulio? and again. - I suppose you was very uneasy because I did not write her xxxxxx tell you the truth I was Inclined to be lazy, but xxxx xxxxxx now and I am going on cheerily with my duty xxxx xxxxx the provisions on my hands has for liquor I can have it whenever I want it. but I never want it for my own use. I do not know that I can say any more. So give my duty to my Grandfather and Grandma and my love to you my brother and Sister and love to all the young Ladies also Compliments to all enquirers.
	I remain My dear Mother Your dutiful and Affectionate Son Abraham Sugden.
	PS direct to the Musquidobet Shooner at Portsmouth, and forgive this scrall.. I shall write to My Aunt Sally very soon. there is a great many orders about the smugglers. We are fitting out for the Smugglers, Adieu, AS.
	H.M.Sch^r Musquidobet Plymouth Sound July 18^th 1816
1816: aged 16 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At M^r T Sopers Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother Having wrote to you before and not having receiv’d any answer makes me conclude that you have been very ill , or are ill at present; which I hope is not the case, as I should be very uneasy. I do not know what I have done that I should be treated in this manner, you may think that I am very neglectful in not writing to you before, but I can assure you that it is not the case. Since I wrote to you we have been on a three Months cruise and have just arrived. I am very sorry indeed that you should forget me in this manner, I hope that the affection you had for me before is not lost! If it is! I am a poor outcast and unfit to live if that is the case I will not cannot live. I’ll make away with myself some way or the other:- if I have done any thing that should displease you, tell me of it that I may conduct myself in that manner that a Son ought to do to a Mother. Since we have been out we have been in a great many places about the Irish and Scotch Coasts (have taken nothing) I have been to Dublin two or three times, it is a fine City, it would astonish you to see the Superb buildings that are there, there is the College, and Nelsons Monument which are very Grand. The streets are very clean indeed, the Shops and public Offices are in great order. that it sets every thing off. I understand that it is a war with the ?Algenines,?Myenines? I wish to gracious that they would send us up the Mediterranean, that we might have the Glory of punishing those Gentlemen Turks – such a cowardly sett. I wonder how they dare to presume to make any disturbance with Great Britian the conquerors of Europe – I hope our Admiral will give them a sound drubbing, such a one has they will not get the better of for these many years to come. – let me return to myself once more respecting my clothes – I have only one suit that is any ways respectable to go on duty, my old clothes I wear constantly at Sea, and in harbour I am obliged to go a little ?dicestitor? all my linen is dirty, and I do not know how to get them clean unless you send me some Cash – I owe a small bill to my Mess which I am not able to pay – I don’t know what I am to do without you help – let me have an answer to this immediately and do not keep me in suspense nor hurt my feelings any more, let me know what I am to do. I do my duty agreeably to my Captain’s wishes, which I thank God for – I send my duty to my Grandfather & Grandmother and hope they are well, also my kind love to you . my dear Brother and Sister, and they are the same with my best respects to M^r & M^rs Smith and family .
	I remain My dear Mother Your dutiful and Affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	P.S. write immediately and forgive this Scrall as it is 1 AClock in the morning. Adieu, Adieu A.Sugden
	His Majesty’s Sch^r Musquidobet Cork December 6^th 1816
1816: aged 17 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At M^r T Sopers Rainham Near Rochester Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother I have wrote to you three times since I received your last; which makes me uneasy and am afraid something has happened at home which you do not like to let me know of – our ?assets? was paid the other day and I received 17Ł for six months wages, I purchased a great coat and a new suit of cloathes, a new hat and three pair of shoes besides paying My mess which came to 3Ł. My old clothes are entirely gone. I have lost all my pocket handkerchieves except two, and my towels with 3 pair of Stockings, by being Stole at the wash, all my shirts are too small for me, every time I put them on they are ready to choak me. and reach half way down my thighs which is very uncomfortable. I have got 3 pairs of duck trousers which I wear at Sea. they are famous things for keeping my blue trousers from dirt etct. We have been cruizing about, ever since but have taken nothing, the Schooner has been to Greenock lately you cannot conceive what a beautiful appearance it is going up the Clyde about 1 mile across and about Glasgow there are a great many gentlemans estates each side of the river which has a lovely prospect. Greenock is a great merchantile town, and a very neat place altogether it is far superior to Cork the situation of the place makes it a great deal more comfortable, there are great number of steam boats that carry passengers from Greenock to Glasgow which is a very pretty sight to see about you & of them in a line full of people coming down the river. I understand there are several situations for Clerks in Chatham yard that are vacant: I wish you would get me in one of them, for I am certain whilst I stop in the Navy in the capacity I’m in now, I shall never get forward for promotion is so dull at this time it is impossible to get forward unless a person has a great deal of Interest which you know I have not. I should not be half the expence in a situation of that description as what I am now, being always at home etct. It would be great deal more comfortable to me and a convenience to you, for I could help you greatly in your school; doing the offices of a writing master and teach the young ones to read etct. all which would take a great deal of your hands and make you comfortable. to see your two sons & daughter sitting by you reading and spending our leisure time in rest and quietness and prayers to the Almighty to help you and your little family in these days of necessity & we have had a very busy Cruize and going out again to encounter the Stormy Sea we have often expected to go to the bottom by having so many hard Gales of wind – the harvest in Ireland this summer has been very bad indeed the farmers have been obliged to cut the wheat down to make ?miscine? by reason of its not being ripe. I hope you had a better one in England than ourselves. I understand old Mr ?ffⁿ Sugden is dead. I wish to know whether it is the case or not, and have to beg you will write to me oftener than you have done of late for I can assure you, unless I hear from you I have no pleasure in this life, give my love to all friends at Deal and tell them the next letter I write to them to answer it that is if they have no objection, without the wish to close all acquaintance with me. My duty to my Grandfather and Grandmother, my kind love to you my dear brother and Sister with Compliments to all friends
	– I remain My dear Mother Your dutiful & Affectionate Abraham Sugden

	His Majestys Shr Musquidobet Belfast Lough May 31^st 1817
1817: aged 17 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr T Sopers Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My Dear Mother I received your most welcome letter after we returned from a Cruize. I hope you will forgive me my negligence in not writing to you before. When I received it, I was in the height of business getting the Captains, Pursers, Gunner, boatswains & Carpenters Annual Accounts ready to pay the respective Officers which has taken me a long time. I am sorry that I mentioned in my last that I expected to be home shortly because at that time we expected the Schr to go to England to be paid and I thought that I myself get time to go home. That is the only reason I mentioned it. As for your getting me a situation on shore I do not expect, but if it should happen that the Sch^r was paid off, sooner than be idle at home I would help my Grandfather in any part of his farm. I believe the Schooner will stay at the station as long as any other Cruizer, if any thing to the reverse should happen I will let you know immediately, but if she should be paid off I really do not know what Ship I could get onto at this time for as soon as one goes out of the Service his situation is filled up immediately. I hope and am certain you will have no cause of complaint with respect to the company I keep. The family I mentioned in my last, my Commander was introduced to and it is very odd and out of all reasons if he, a Man of his rank in life besides having a large family to take care of would introduce me to a family that was not a respectable one according to his own circumstances, I shall always be very glad indeed to have advice from you . Knowing at the same time there is no other person that I would pay more attention to than yourself in every respect and should be very sorry to find that you have for ever had a bad opinion of me or my conduct. O that I had never known what a Man of War was it is the utter ?curse? of any young man I wish that I had never left home that I might be under your eye then you would never have had any occasions to form any unjust suspicions I wish to do good, to do my duty and always support my character as a Gentleman – I have been in HM Service 5 years 24^th June next, rated Clerk from the 16^th Sep^r 1815. I believe I shall continue in the situation till the Ship is paid off when I have served my time has Clerk. I will pass for a Purser, I would now if the’d let me, I shall want a certificate from the Clergyman of my age. I do not want it now when I do I will let you know. If you can get him to put me down 12 or 18 months older than in fact I really am it will be of great service, because I must be 21 Years of age before they will pass me, it is nothing more than a matter of form sometimes they will dispense with it. Its according to what sort of a Captain I have to examine me, if he sticks up to the rotine of the Service I may probably deceive him If I do there will be no harm done I am not doing him any harm, but I am doing myself good. If you remember when I wrote to you after I found the Schooner I told you I expected to get a pension for a hurt I received, well I am ruptured perhaps I may get a Small ticket I can’t say any thing yet about it, I may probably let you know more about it in my next. I am obliged to wear a truss constantly. It is not so bad as we expected. I can’t say where I was hurt, but I think it was a kick from a little poney that my Grandf^r had when I was at home I can’t xxxx. We have detained an American Ship for having more passengers than her compliment. We are dubious if we shall get any thing for her or not, if we do it will be trifling. I wish it was a good hot War with the Yanks if I had my will tomorrow I would exterminate them from the face of the Earth. I would freely give what wages I have coming to me (and me to be in a longer frigate) to have a War – I have not made any inquiries about the carriage of the Shirts when we go to Plymouth which I believe will be in 2 or 3 months time. I will let you know, I mean to purchase a Small Library when you ?see? it. It is a collection of my own choice. I am sure you will not be displeased with it. I am very fond of History and Poetry, I wish to gracious that it laid
	Letter comes to an end, probably continued on crossways writing on top of this letter that has faded.

	His Majestys Schnr Musquidobet Cork Harbour Sept 16^th 1817
1817: aged 17 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At Mr Thos Sopers Rainham Near Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My Dear and Honoured Mother I received your melancholy letter this days date Oh my poor unfortunate Father is he gone and I can not see him. I would have given my life to have had a parting kiss, a blessing - any thing, what must his thoughts have been in that awful hour, a ?kiss? two Sons and a Daughter and not one of them, what a cruel cruel Sister, the least she could have done was to have let his wife know of his illness; is it possible that she should carry her animosity to the grave. Oh my dear Mother you do not know how I feel. I can not say more than I could wish on this subject my mind much agitated. Yes I will pay every respect that is due to his recent honor'd remains that Man was led away or he could never have acted thus, but is sinful to bring up a Man's frailty's after he is gone I believe the last time I saw him was in the Goliath's Cabin, even then heaven knows what I felt . I wept. I could do more, he promised to be good and live as his situation in life would allow. I intended to have had some very serious conversation with him when I cam home but alas he's no more; May God forgive him as I do. If this letter should happen to fall in the hands of my Cousins they may probably think it all a pack of nonsense, but I must let them know it flows from an affectionate heart, one that must for ever pray for his departed Soul; let me turn from this melancholy subject. I mean to speak about my Aunt and family. In the first place let them cease all former grievances and misunderstandings that have taken place in our unfortunate family, and in future let the greatest friendship and harmony consist between two family's so nearly related. In not complying with the above, (in my humble opinions) they forfeit all Laws both human and divine, I could now fully explain myself if I was with you, but that happiness is not allotted to the unfortunate A Sugden; I think Mr William Sugden could get me in the Dock Yard as a Clerk in some of the Offices, you must understand that this is only a temporary situation, there is an order in Councils not to make any more Pursers and surely you don't mean me to stop in this place all my life time, I wish to God you had never consented to my coming in a Man of War, it is the most abominable of al places; unless a person could get some lucrative situation. I would not give a pin to be in the Navy, I have lost more than I shall ever gain, so much vice and every thing that's bad, unless a youth is placed under the eye of a strict disciplinarian, on first going in a Man of War it is almost impossible to keep him from the snares that are laid to bring him to the brink of destruction. If you are on friendly terms with my Uncle I beg you will speak to him about what I mentioned to you above. I hope Eliza and her husband are comfortable. I hope also that they will not feel the misery I may say of being persecuted, Is Sarah looking out for a husband yet, I think she deserves a good one, she's my favorite of the two. We have been on a long Cruise but have taken nothing, its expected we shall have a war with Spain I wish it was to morrow nothing would give me greater pleasure I should like amazingly to be fingering their Doubleloons its time I should have something for my Services; I believe we shall not go to Plymouth before the latter end of December next. I am allowed to draw my pay instead of waiting until the Ship is paid which is a very good thing, my Bills becomes due on the 2nd of December, the Amount of it will be 20Ł-9-6d I draw it every 168 days, the amount 21Ł odd which will be paid when we go to Plymouth, then I shall be able to send part of it hom; You ask'd me in your former letter what I thought of my Officers, the Commander and Surgeon are two excellent charaters, but our Acting Master is of a tyrannical disposition, he is brother in law to the Commr, Prim and I had hot words the other day he called me without any provocation whatever, every thing but a Gentleman, for which I was nearly knocking him down for with an Iron Bar you know I would never put up with an insult not even from my father, If I had struck him very serious consequences would have followed, but all is settled we are friend again . I can assure you he was in the wrong which when I see you I will let you know the case of it. - In another Month I shall arrive at the age of 18 at that time all young Men ought to be settled for life but here I am like a vessel that is sent to Sea badly Manag'd for buffets against the waves for a long time and at last is obliged to return to port all worn out. Letter comes to an end, probably continued on crossways writing on top of this letter that has faded.


	St Georges House of ?Ruovay? Circular Road Dublin Jan^y 18 ^th1818
1818: aged 18 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden At M^r T. Sopers Rainham Near Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear beloved Mother I received your moving letter on the 20^th of Dec^r last when it came I was lying on a Sick bed & have been ill since the 12^th of October. I am not well yet but I expect to be perfectly so in about three weeks time my disorder is called Herpes it comes from a slight cold after which my body from head to foot broke out In ulcers but now thank God I am recovering fast. For 3 weeks I was in such a dreadful state that even life was despaired of my head has been shaved and I wear a wig. This illness had made me a skeleton but I hope soon to recover what I have lost. The clothes that were too small for me previous to my falling ill are too big for me now it has cost me about 5Ł to get necessaries including the wig which cost one guinea. I must tell you how well I have been treated by M^r Rud’s family residing at Carlingford all the time the Musquidobet was lying in that port, I received the greatest kindness if I had been one of the family I could not have been treated better. now for something that will make you laugh, the last time we were lying in Carlingford I sent on shore by the coxwain for some bread, eggs & milk. He got all but the eggs so my joker goes to this gentleman’s house and who should meet him but M^rs Garner one of the family but you must know that she and I are very good friends he tells her how ill I was and what I wanted, she immediately burst into tears after giving full vent to her feelings, she goes with the man all over the town running all the time without bonnet on purpose to get what he was deficient. the next day she wrote a letter addressing me as her dear Sugden wanting me to go and live with them until I got well. I have not yet had the pleasure to return her my very grateful thanks. when I do I shall feel very curious not knowing how to address her, any other person I might. You have given me my charge after I leave the Schooner, either of going to the East Indies or going to school for a year and then going as an assistant, in my humble opinion the latter is far preferable to the former, but I leave it all to your superior knowledge of those things, Oh! I dont know what I should do without your help, I see I should be completely astray. I am very sorry still to find that you harbour unjust suspicions respecting my attention to my duty. I think it is plainly to be seen, if there was any deficiency I should not hold my situation long. I have purchased six linen shirts they cost me 12/8 a piece, my old ones are of no use to me now being too small when I go to put them on they split across the back. I forgot to tell you that I came to this Hospital on the 17^th of November/ I have been a whole week writing this letter and you will excuse it for my poor head and eyes are so very weak that I am not able to sit up more than four hours a day. I can get my discharge now but I think I had better stop until the Schooner is paid off. – I have about 21Ł in hand when the Schooner is paid off which I shall bring home and probably I’ll have 20 more that I shall save out of the wages that is coming to me. I should be very much obliged if you could lend me with Six months credit the Sum of two pounds for I have no Money at present and I want to get a few necessaries against my going aboard the Schooner, if you can not do it, pay the postage of your letter, which I hope you will send upon receipt of this and let me have all the news you can collect for as bad as you think me I can assure you it is all the comfort I have. I hope you will not refuse me. If you do it will make me very miserable for I do not like to ask any other person but yourself for anything of the kind by the time this reaches you I shall not have a clean shirt to put on, I dirty about four shirts a week my body being in such a state you can enclose two one pound notes in your letter very well and you may depend upon it being returned in the course of Six Months. Give my duty to my Grandf^r & M^r for your happiness I pray night and morning my love to my Brother and my dear Sister. you may just tell my uncle and aunt that I am very well for I plainly see they care nothing for your poor Abe, when I come home they probably may want to see me, if they do, they shall come to me not me to them for I wont trouble myself about them, give my compliments to M^rSmith’s & M^r Rickets families.
	I remain My ever dear beloved Mother Your dutiful and affectionate Son Abraham Sugden
	P.S. Write to the Hospital for directions look at the date and write by return of post Adieu
	Musquidobet at Sea April 15^th 1818
1818: aged 18 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden at M^r T Soper's Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My dear Mother What am I to think of your long silence it is now more than three months since I heard from you. your last I answered immediately upon receiving it. I was lying very ill at the same time, hardly able to help myself to any thing that was given me, one would suppose you would be glad to hear from him whom you have often said you was as fond of as any of the rest of the family. It does not appear so, I do not presume to censure you far from it. I’ll allow that I have been remiss at times but in such a case where life was despaired of to find my letters treated lightly makes me very uneasy. I have done nothing that you should use me thus , indeed you must allow it was unkind to think that I have incurr’d your displeasure without the least knowledge makes me miserable, if you have not quite oblterat’d me from your memory do write and not keep me in suspense – Since I began this my Commander has been to Dublin, and he was as good as to call at the Post Office for my letter, but he was told that the Office was only open from 10 to 12 in this day and that all letters were returned to London when they have been lying in the Post Office above a fortnight. I suppose that mine is served in the same way – I heard there was a double letter for me in February last , but being at Sea and when I was in harbour too late for post. I might have got it at one time, but then I had no money neither could I borrow any . I again joined my vessel on the 18^th of February, I was not perfectly cured nor am I at present for I still have some remains of the disorder. I was three months in that hospital two of which and a few days my pay was stopt according to the regulations of the Service – when I was there I was treated by the matron a most respectable woman as if I had been one of her own family if I had been at home I do not think better care could have been taken of me. I believe I mentioned of my being acquainted with a M^r Read at Carlingford from his family experienced great kindness, when our vessel was at that place (this was before I went to the Hospital) they sent me every day a young pullet, and every thing that I wished for. I should have wrote to you immediately on my recovery but expecting answers to some which I wrote during my illness, and knowing that there was one in the office for my collection I supposed came from you but as I find it is returned, I have now gave you sorry particularly concerning this silence and I hope you will not attribute it to any negligence of mine in not writing before. I should be very glad if you would tell me in your next what I am to do when I return home. If you have any regard for my future prospects I beg you will exert all that be in your power to get me in some established line of business whatever it is. I hope you will let me know any at the same time. I hope it will be a respectable one for my Commander is so very hard to please and cross with all that. I have often been induced to get my discharge and come home and if there was no employment for me I would go to hard labour. I am young and I thank God there is nothing after a little practice but get masters of. I must now give you an account of my other affairs. I have 2 suit of blue clothes pretty good, only 7of my old shirts remaining, some were lost, three I cut up to mend others and 4 or 5 I was obliged to throw away when I was in the Hospital, they being in such a dreadful state from my sores that when I sent them to be wash’d the woman refused to wash them, so I was obliged to purchase some linen to make six new ones which cost me 12/8 thrice, Seven pair of Duck trousers, 5 pair of white cotton Stock^gs, 4 pair of worsted, 2 pocket handkerchiefs, 5 Guernsey frocks and four pair of draw’s. You have now a true account of my wearing apparel, there are some more things that I have not mentioned as I am not in want of them. I don’t mean for you to get any thing for me, for I know it is out of your power to send them. I must make the best shift I can until I get more. I have not a farthing of Money nor neither shall I have any until the 4^th of August, when my bill becomes due, unless you can send me some which I hope you will that is if you can spare it. I hope my brother Thomas likes his situation, and I hope also he will be comfortably provided for before he comes to my age, has for myself I firmly believe I shall be a wanderer all my life time. I was bound to be unfortunate. In this station of life I shall never prosper no friends, no promotion & no nothing, if I had the first I might probably get on, but at present I am doing no good for myself, and I’m afraid will always be a burthen to my mother. Tis true I have 40 Ł a year it keeps me from want, nothing more, but will that 40Ł be coming in all my life time, if it did I should be contented, it is not for myself I am concerned, nor my brother. No it is My dear Sister, what will become of her when you are gone, none of her Aunts would take any care of her, if such a thing was to happen. They would immediate say No, I can’t be troubled with any other persons children, I have plenty of my own to look after, as for myself sooner than ask one of them for a morsel of bread, if I wanted it I would go begging from door to door first, this is my reason for getting in a situation which I hope you will see the necessity of – I hope affairs will not turn out so badly as I have painted them God forbid. I am only giving you the good opinion I hold my relatives. Do not forget to give me an answer to this as soon as possible and if you can conveniently spare the money it will be very acceptable as I want a few necessary articles which I cannot properly do without. Direct this letter at Dunleavy and Dublin at a unit “tile will ‘d fire” there. I stand some chance of getting on. Give my Duty to my Grandfather my Grandmother , my love to my Brother and Sister and Believe me to be
	My dear Mother Your affectionate Son Abraham Sugden.
	P.S. cannot Thomas give me a line if I knew where to direct I would write to him. There is one thing more I must acquaint you with, I should be glad of some of your advice thereon for it is of such a serious nature that I stand in great need. If what I have done does not meet with your approbation, I hope you will not be displeased with me it is this, when I was in Dublin I became acquainted with a very amiable young lady. I must tell the truth and not prevaricate, well there, she has join’d my affections, she has no fortune, has had a very good education, and is pleasing in the highest degree. Affairs of this nature are so very serious, that I never mean to enter into any engagements, let them be ever so lucrative, without first having your advice thereon if there’s any particulars that I can give you about this fair one, you shall if required, have them in my next. Let me know the result of my proceedings without delay for I fear that this affair may not go to far and have to act for I mean to go by your directions, let your Commands be ever so severe. Adieu.
	His Majesty's Schooner Musquidobet August 15^th 1818 at sea
1818: aged 18 Addressed to: M^rs Sugden Mr T Soper's Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My Dear Mother With pleasure I have to acknowledge the receipt of your two letters and the Money, for which I have to return you my most grateful thanks, this is the first time I have heard from you since December 1817 tho' I give you my word that I have wrote four letters since. I hope you will forgive the fears that I was under, nature itself directed these, but no more, I am now amply recompensed. - I find some person has been spinning you a long yarn concerning my pay, you say I ought to be more saving. I told you once before, and I tell you again that I will do the best I can, you do not know how I am situated. - You say that I have been more expence to you, than either my brother or Sister, both their sums added together would not make so much as mine - I know perfectly well that my Schooling was expensive, but really I don't know that I have had so great a Sum as you imagine since I had the misfortune of coming to Sea. - at any rate I hope a day will come when I shall be able to repay you all the trouble you have been at on my Account - upon my word you make me speak very strange. I never thought till now that I had been so great a burthen upon a parent who I can with safety call God to witness say that I honor more than my own soul, and always will, - but let all that rest. I hope a time will come when my actions and not words will cancel everything. I believe you think me a fool / excuse me for a making use of such an expression / or something worse, when you suppose that I had or have any idea of marriage, when I innocently told you the truth, I thought there was no harm, one person may be fond of one other, without going to such lengths. No my dear Mother when I can see all of you genteely and comfortably provided for, then I may with propriety be thinking of such a thing. ...- You tell me to please my commander I am sorry to inform you that we are not at present as much as upon speaking terms (duty excepted) for this reason, when I was in Cork last, I slept out of the Vessel for two nights at a Gentlemans house, in the mean time there was some small ?he co net? Wanted for the Admiral, which in my absence he could not get. But I am in hopes he will come too in a few days time, such things will happen to any person, who has been ?Spent? as you may term a person, let matters turn out as they will. I am resol'd when the vessel is paid off, or tomorrow, to return home / that is if I have your permission for I can assure you that I am heartily tired of her it is very odd when I could please very Captain that I have sail'd with that I can't please this Man in any Single thing. - You tell me that I shall not be able to obtain a situation, without a letter of recommendation, if that is really the case. I shall never get one, for I believe there is no prospects as to that point, my Certificates would be recommendation enough, but I should like to have something more than a Certificate for my own satisfaction to show. - I give you my word you certainly have a very handsome way in paying a person a compliment. You say "hundreds of people and of Characters have been out of employ" - / I suppose you mean to say that mine will not bear inspection, if you do. I can assure you that you are mistaken, I can with the greatest propriety defy a single soul to say anything derogotary to my character. - I am very happy to hear that my brother likes his situation, but really I think. Mr Cork carries this joke too far when he comes to boxing a persons ear, if he was my Master he should not do it with impunity, and perhaps has it is he may one day beg my poor brother's pardon for the offence, no Gentleman would strike another in whatever situation he may be plac'd. - I think if I should have the happiness to get home, it would be very hard to get me from it, for I am heartily tired of being in this situation, I have seen more for the last three years than I ever wish to see again, but I don't mind. I have a heart I thank God that can bear all hardships - . I do not know what I shall do when I come home among so many giants, such a little mankin as myself will not be able to take a walk without meeting some of these terrible big people - I mean the Smiths. You tell me they are full of pride, I hope they will **** well bloated with that infection by the time I come ?athawl? their house. - It gives me great pleasure to hear of Miss Stanton's welfare, all that I regret is that she hasn't some money. I would not mind going halves - a small Six hundred would do us no harm, make my best respects to them. - I wish that Madam Fortune when she is so playfully inclined, would turn her wheel a little more to the eastward, I think she might condescend to visit us rustics a little more than she does. - It is my opinion that the Schooner will be paid off the latter end of October or the middle of Novr our time is up the 9th of the month, I shall have then 22Ł which I intend bringing home exclusive of all expensces - You say M^rs K told you that my pay was considerably augmented, if you look in my letters of 1817 you will find that I told you of it too. I wish to know do you think 40Ł a year too much for me, I can tell you this before I sail with a Lieut t again he shall give me ?111? Ł a year exclusive of my pay according to the general practice of Lieuts with Clerks, and if I had known as much has I do know, I would have had it before I joined the Schooner.


	His Majestys Ship Musquidobet 7^th March 1819
1819: aged 19 Addressed to: M^rs F Sugden C/o Mr T Soper’s Rainham Chatham Kent See notes & pictures.	My Dear Mother Yours of the 28^th Ult^o I received the 5^th Inst. I should have wrote before, but expecting the Schooner soon to sail for England daily I wanted to see M^r R and let you know the result of our meeting before that took place which I shall now inform you of according to your desire. I waited on him the first opportunity and after some talk about my future proceeding as to my passage home & he told me that the best thing for me to do would be to proceed home as fast as possible after the Schooner was paid off. to get a good Certificate from my Commander and perhaps something might be done for me with the united efforts of my Grandf^r and Uncle William as to procuring me a situation . He also said that his friend Sir H Blackwood would be in Dublin in the summer, he says that will do all that is in his power for me, but that at present he does not know what could be done, only what I mentioned before as to my Grandf^r. I fear that M^r R is rather to hasty in drawing a conclusion with respect to me he knows that our Vessel had sailed on a Cruize we have been out at sea 2 weeks from Dublin since I wrote to you last and its very odd if I could see him during that time, and I at Sea or some other place. I don’t know what made him tell M^rs that he thought I was home by this time. the last time I had the pleasure of being in his company was on the 23^rd of last Month – there’s another thing that I have found out, and that is that greatly exaggerated on my unfortunate illness when he wrote to M^rs R informing her of it, it certainly was an indelicate thing of him to write to any female on such a subject. had he (when he was acquainted with my illness) given me some advice and told me how serious my case was in the eyes of my maker! and kept it to himself I should have been very thankful to him for some such conduct indeed. I hardly know what to say concerning it but I think a great deal, I know, was I to give you my opinion of it I should only receive your answer and that is what I wish to avoid. Did you but know the ?nonsense? that my misconduct has occasioned I think you would be inclined to forgiveness you may depend that whilst I breathe I will never cease ?? or give you occasion to dislike me any more, it is not in words alone, but my actions and my future conduct shall bear testimony as to the truth of my affections. I shall be very glad when you write to my Captⁿ for I long to know what he would say, he is very impatient now and I have not the least doubt that the character he will give of me will be a friendly one. I would ask that you would send to him by return of post waiting at Dunharry near Dublin. Should my Grandfather be so fortunate as to obtain a situation for me in the East India ??? I can’t know how I shall be able to express my gratitude to him for it but I would sooner be at home near you if such could be possibly done whatever situation. In this life I may be placed in, I thank God I can always make myself contented and I am very thankful
	the rest of this is unreadable as the writing is faint and tinier than ever – I don’t really know how I got this far with it! It is the last teenage letter I have from Abraham to his mother.

Home
Adult letters

This page updated 22nd June 2012